


(it's only a) paper moon

by goldengoddess



Category: Metal Gear
Genre: Holding Hands, M/M, fallin in Big Love, not actually angsty despite the description lol, vingettey, ya know
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-25
Updated: 2017-09-25
Packaged: 2019-01-05 05:56:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12184227
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goldengoddess/pseuds/goldengoddess
Summary: Snake’s eyes shifted under his eyelids, like he was trying to wake up, but couldn’t. “Thank- you.” he breathed.“Thank you for coming out alive.” he smiled weakly.Snake muttered something inaudible, his lips parted gently as he sucked in air through his teeth.“What’s that?” Otacon said, leaning closer to him.“Let’s go-” he said, “let’s go home.”





	(it's only a) paper moon

**Author's Note:**

> thanks ella fitzgerald for my life

I.

Four and a half hours ago Snake had run into the ghost of an old friend. Now he was standing above the freshly dead Sniper Wolf, a newly acquainted scientist looking in horror upon her body. He didn’t feel pity as he watched the man kneel down in the snow under the moonless black sky, or shame as his hand clasped over his mouth, but stood back and let him mourn. How had this man come to know Sniper Wolf? What had he seen in her? Maybe he was a fool and fell for whatever game she played, but he couldn’t entirely discredit his sadness. No one deserved that, even if the insult was not spoken aloud.

Otacon finally heaved a sigh, his shoulder shaking against the snow. His shadow fell over the woman’s corpse like a blanket, shielding her from the ice beginning to creep up her fingertips. He wondered if anyone would find her before spring, or if she’d be doomed to mummification under ice packed upon ice. Otacon coughed, wracking his lungs, and Snake looked up at him. He was fairly young, but looked more like a dead body than the sniper, his eyes sunken and skin pallid. Snake felt an odd pang. If he was a different man, he thought, if these had been different circumstances, he would’ve grabbed Otacon’s hand. Just for a moment, before letting go and walking off. But Otacon sniffed and met Snake’s gaze.

 

II.

  


The water was colder than ice, and Otacon had not brought enough layers. But he could hardly think about the cold as he searched the dark water for movement. The motorboat was old and stolen, borrowed just for the night, and all lights were shut off. It was just him, the rocking water, and the darkness of the new moon. They had planned this out- they had gone through the plan hundreds of times. Snake told him he talked in his sleep, rambling about files and ships and men and the ocean until he had become worried. The week before the mission, Snake had shaken him awake from his nightmares. This was, above all, his nightmare. It was Snake, he rationalized. This was Snake, who was practically bullet proof (but not entirely, Otacon knew too well). This was Snake, who could knock out a man silently. This was Snake, who was now swimming, entirely safe, up to Otacon’s boat.

But they were both just men, nothing more, despite all people thought.

Otacon pushed back Plan B into the far reaches of his mind. It scared him, a little, but he was not incapable of doing it by himself. The body bag was uncannily close to him. All it would take was some heavy lifting and he would sail away. By himself. He went back to surveying the black water.

It took another ten minutes for Snake to emerge from the waters. Small gasps escaped his lips as Otacon looped his arms under his armpits. He pulled back, landing both of them on the floor of the boat, soaked.

“Snake?” Otacon asked, with no reply. He escaped from underneath him and checked his pulse- weak, but alive. He pushed Snake down into a more comfortable position and threw the wool blanket he had been wearing on top of him. He was ready to finish the job himself.

He unzipped the bag and grimaced, the smell still strong and coupled with a familiar face. But he didn’t retch, and managed to dump the body over the side of the boat by himself, slamming back onto the floor as the weight left his arms. Otacon breathed deeply and looked over at his partner, asleep on the floor. It always shocked him how similar he looked to his brother, to the corpse. His deep set eyes and high cheekbones made him look older than he was. Otacon’s hand went to brush aside Snake’s wet hair.

“Otacon.” Snake mumbled.

“Snake!” He looked over him, shocked that he had come to so quickly.

Snake’s eyes shifted under his eyelids, like he was trying to wake up, but couldn’t. “Thank- you.” he breathed.

“Thank you for coming out alive.” he smiled weakly.

Snake muttered something inaudible, his lips parted gently as he sucked in air through his teeth.

“What’s that?” Otacon said, leaning closer to him.

“Let’s go-” he said, “let’s go home.”

  


III.

  
Evening had long since fell upon the woods, and the day was over. Instead of crashing into their beds and sleeping off the last thirty-six hours of work, the two decided on a walk. Otacon chattered about Star Trek as they stepped through the trees, biting against the freezing air. Farther into the woods than they had ever strolled, Otacon stopped, facing a new meadow.

Snake huffed, his breath fogging in the freezing air, as Otacon stared out at the night.

"Nice view?" Snake asked.

Otacon nodded, digging his chin into his scarf. Snake looked out at the field, empty save for them, and then up at the sky. An orange moon was hanging low, just barely sitting over top the trees.

"I've never seen the moon so big before."

"Never?"

He shook his head. "I've seen- I mean I've seen harvest moons before but this is- this has got to be something else."

"Huh, I guess so." Snake said, his gaze following back to Otacon. He looked in awe, struck by some kind of reverence he had never known before. Snake wondered when the last time he had felt that was. When had he last been so enchanted by the moon? Otacon's glasses reflected the soft orange light. Snake looked behind them, back into the dark woods that led to the dark streets that led to their dark apartment. Then he looked back to Otacon.

"People have walked there before." he said, "It's kinda weird to think about- someone's left Earth and walked on a rock floating around it." Otacon gave a small laugh, still not looking away, "Amazing."

"Yeah." Snake said, not sure if he felt the same kind of displacement Otacon was feeling. "Otacon." Snake said.

He looked over, breaking his spell. "Yeah- oh," he said, his eyes moving over Snake. "Uh, hi." he smiled his lopsided smile. They had gotten closer as they had walked into the meadow, Snake now face to face with him.

"Let's take walks more often."

"Sure, Snake."

"We never see the moon like this."

"No, we don't."

"You like it, right?"

"I do."

"Can I kiss you?"

Otacon's mouth dropped a fraction of an inch. "Oh, uh- yeah, yes, sure."

"Yeah?"

He nodded. Snake closed the small gap between them and closed his eyes. He could feel a gloved hand escaping from Otacon's jacket and placed on his cheek. It was warm, just like Otacon's breath.

He moved back, only a small amount, and let Otacon's hand stay on his face.

"Snake." he said. "One day, let's get a real house."

He laughed.

"No, I'm serious."

Snake looked up, he was serious. Otacon's brows furrowed as he spoke, "Hey- we deserve it. You deserve it. We could have dogs, and a garden."

He gave a soft smile. "Okay,"

"Okay? You wouldn't mind destroying robots anymore?"

"Would you?"

Otacon shook his head with a laugh, "I don't think I would."

The moon rose silent above the woods, their shadows elongating against the duff and twigs. Even if it was a joke, a hollow dream for the future, Snake decided it was okay to hope for. For if Otacon wanted it as much as Snake did, they were bound to the same ambition, and they were bound to the same life. And, he thought, hand slipping into Otacon's pocket to grab his, he wouldn't mind being with Otacon a little longer.

  
  



End file.
